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A sideways look at mediation...

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19/04/2012

Vampire Mediation

“In a world where the dead are returning to life the word “trouble” loses much of its meaning”
(George A Romero, Land of the Dead)

Selling mediation outside the narrow professional confines of dispute resolution professionals has always been tricky. At cocktail parties I find my companions glaze over just after I have explained the difference between mediation and arbitration so that I never really get my teeth into confidentiality or transformative theory. Soon they are looking about for somebody more interesting to talk to, like an actuary. What is to be done?

Dispute resolution has been screaming for new blood for some time. So a new and rich vein of talent is now being opened in support of mediation as two of the most exciting buzz words of the modern era are combined in a thrilling alliance.

I bring you

Vampire Mediation

“These guys really mediate outside the box! (when they’ve finished they get back in there!)”

“They don’t facilitate, they transform!”

I bring you news from the Vampire Mediation Council’s upcoming national conference where the topics covered will include:

  • the Werewoolf reforms: what difference do they really make (especially at full moon)?
  • the law of mediation confidentiality: a stake through the heart of the movement ?
  • time-limited mediation: how to be sure you are done by dawn.
  • the EU Mediation Directive: a Transylvanian response
  • the VMC: should we subscribe - or should we join hands and try to contact the living?

Next full moon posting:

  • The mediators from hell: we talk to the top guys ( their tricks, their foibles, their blood groups).
  • Watch out for my essential discussion: “Bitemarks or rapport: do we have to choose?”

and

  • should we all flap over to a jurisdiction where our brethren enjoy the full and proper protection of statutory confidentiality? (See Perkins (executors of) v Dracula 15 Cal Sup Ct 3871)

There is a mass market out there somewhere , I swear.